Allee Willis Blog

02Sep 2010

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ the Day – Miniature 1970’s Wooden Bowling Pin

02Sep 2010

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ the Day – Miniature 1970’s Wooden Bowling Pin

bowling-pin-mini_5294 Anyone who knows me knows I love bowling. It’s not the sport itself but, rather, the accessories that go along with it that make my heart sing. I have no idea what this little mini pin was made for – I’m guessing a standalone trophy – but I found two of them and wish I had more. I used the first one as the end of a banister going up my stairs:

I don’t known what The Fun Club was but I want to be a part of anything with that name. I also love anything that’s formally printed up where someone can’t resist the urge to embellish it with their own personal painting touch. The ‘Tom’ (or is it ‘Glom’?) and the ‘218’ add such an elegance to the pin.

Nowadays, this little pin’s only job is to stand around and look pretty. Every now and then I hear it being batted around the house by the cats. I know it’s the bowling ball that’s supposed to roll but I hope this pin has some sense of the energy of its big brother bowling pin heritage and can enjoy its journey skidding over the hard wood floor, even though it’s been hit by a cat and not a ball.

26Aug 2010

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – Vintage “Sexometer” and Dinner with Michael Patrick King

26Aug 2010

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – Vintage “Sexometer” and Dinner with Michael Patrick King

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A few nights ago I had dinner at Street with Michael Patrick King.

Sex and sex appeal are topics on which Michael is an expert given that he writes about them a lot as writer and director of Sex and the City.

We’re great friends and hadn’t seen each other since the second movie came out so there was much to talk about let alone eat. We were joined by the lovely Prudence Fenton and had our usual stuffed-within-an-inch-of-our-lives feast that one naturally expects at Street.

All of which makes our bellies very happy but doesn’t necessarily leave anyone feeling very sexy.

We started with Millet Balls, Street’s version of bread:

That was followed by Lamb Kafta Meatballs over warm Syrian cheese wrapped in grape leaves and drizzled with date and carob molasses and served with za’atar spiced flatbread:

Then came one of my favorite dishes at Street, Ono Sashimi with spicy sesame mayonnaise, yuzu ponzu sauce, smoked salt, pink peppercorns and with savvy radish sprouts. For someone who usually hates ono, sashimi AND peppercorns, that this dish is my fave is quite a feat.

I forgot to photograph the Burmese Melon Salad that came next with melons, toasted coconut, peanuts, fried onions and sesame ginger dressing but Prudence did a lovely job of hand modeling the Shrimp Stuffed Shitake Mushrooms that were tempura fried and filled with shrimp mousse with pozu dipping sauce:

The Wild Columbia River Salmon and Hawaiian fried rice made with brown rice, Chinese sausage, taro root and scallions was a little healthy for me…

… so instead I went for the Brioche Hamburger with Vermont white cheddar, homemade pickles and yuzu kosho mayonnaise…

… and the Vietnamese Corn with 5-spice pork belly, hot chili peppers and scallions…

… topped off with Smashed Potatoes with sour cream, chives and pink peppercorns.

We all had an excellent meal though the last thing anyone felt like doing afterwards was measuring themselves on the Sexometer.

25Jul 2010

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – 1960’s Rubber Doctor Puppet

25Jul 2010

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – 1960’s Rubber Doctor Puppet

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As I lie in bed with food poisoning after ingesting some of the worst food I’ve ever eaten in LA Saturday night (at an expensive downtown restaurant which shall remain nameless as I’m only 99.99% sure it was the scene of the crime and not 100), this rubber doctor puppet seems a very appropriate Kitsch O’ The Day offering. Made by Childcraft in 1968 and used in African-American classrooms to teach about good role models the set also includes two girls, two guys, one kid, a grandmother, a grandfather, a policeman and Nelson Mandela.

The grandfather and Nelson Mandela look suspiciously alike. I like how one can merely change their suit and go from leading a family to leading a nation:

Because I have so much memorabilia and because I throw so many parties and used to shoot a lot of music videos here I always get asked if anything is ever stolen. For 30 years I’ve been very proud to say only one thing and that was an ashtray that was so common among 50’s collectibles that the person who stole it deserved it because anyone who knew their stuff would take one look at it and think that person didn’t really have discriminating taste. All I know is that it was someone in this photo during a Kid Creole and The Coconuts shoot over here in 1989. I have no idea who the guilty party was but it was most certainly not the person in the sunglasses:

Now as I stare at the puppet group three photos above I see that one of the girls is missing too.

This had to have happened during the last six months during which time I threw two parties. I’m at least thankful that whoever copped it didn’t make off with the whole set though I must say that this discovery makes my stomach ache as much the ratty restaurant downtown does.

I’ve loved my Childcraft puppets since the day I found them, not only because they’re one of the few mass-produced vintage products made specifically as African-American teaching aids but because once your hand is stuffed inside of them they’re very malleable and lifelike looking.

Here are two of my favorites with Sammy Davis Jr. guarding my gold records:

Despite the fact that it gave me a great excuse to drag the doctor out, the unnamed downtown restaurant screwed up my entire weekend causing me to miss a panel I was speaking on regarding new technology and the theater, two parties, one photo shoot drive and a movie. I would’ve preferred to make the weekend activities decision on my own rather than let the horrific buttermilk fried chicken that tasted like wood and could chip a tooth, the creepy little cheesecball freebie (thanks for nothing), and tuna tartare, the sloshy mound that I suspect was the main culprit, doom me to a weekend of Gatorade, bananas and saltines between bathroom runs. And I certainly wish my rubber doctor could be of more help than just looking cute.

But then I realize that this is the gift of writing a daily blog, that one can vent about restaurants that think they’re fancy but are merely annoying and in this case dangerous. Thank God there was a doctor in the house to cheer me up somewhat. I have a feeling if I ate the puppet it would have made me feel better than that dreadful meal did.

10May 2010

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – 3D, Miami Beach & Charles Phoenix

10May 2010

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – 3D, Miami Beach & Charles Phoenix

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With 3D all the rage today many people forget that the first ubiquitous mass consumer experience with the technology was with View-Masters. Introduced in 1962, one could view seven 3D images as they spun around on a paper disc creating lifelike reality inside the mouse hole of two eyepieces. The earliest View-Masters featured popular tourist attractions like this one of Miami Beach, where I first started buying these.

When I was young my parents drove to Miami Beach from Detroit twice a year.

We stayed at the Carlyle Hotel.

I bought every Viewmaster reel of Miami Beach I could find because the Deco architecture drove me so batty. When I had my first hit record I immediately bought a house that reminded me of Miami Beach.

A frequent visitor to my house is Charles Phoenix, one of my best friends and Kitschmaster General of vintage slide shows and books featuring insanely on-the-nose location and human examples of living wheels of brie. The last time he came over, Charles gave me a lesson in how to bake one of his signature Cherpumples, a cake with three pies stuffed inside of it. As soon as I get done editing the footage we shot I will post our instructional film.

Something like the Cherpumple with M&Ms bubbling out of the pepto -bismolian-pink frosting and utensils at rest would make an excellent 3D photo if only we had the right camera.

Yesterday, I went downtown with Prudence Fenton, Nancye Ferguson and Jim Burns and saw Charles’ first ever all 3D retro slide show.

We learned a lot about how 3-D photography and View-Masters came into being.

We saw a lot of families in the 50’s learning how to not only use their View-Masters but make their own 3D reels.

Of course, you won’t be able to see anything clearly because you don’t have your 3-D glasses on. As opposed to this slide from Charles’ show featuring an attractive threesome with a very clear view of the LA freeway when it was built in 1960 standing less than 10 feet away next to oncoming traffic.

I hope to have a clear view of the week ahead of me although it could go either way. I could feel like an outsider…

… or I could choose to see the world in super enhanced, bigger than life 3D.

Thank you, Charles for an excellent afternoon and thank you View-Master for putting 3-D in the palm of our hands.

09Mar 2010

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – Plastic Rolly Polly Doll

09Mar 2010

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – Plastic Rolly Polly Doll

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This was a gift from Michael Patrick King, writer and director of Sex and the City, a couple of years ago for my birthday. I always thought the doll had a Carrie Bradshaw vibe to her, smiling and happy and looking good in red. One day I slammed my shin into the table Rolly Polly sits on and it made such a great chime sound I didn’t mind the dripping gash down below. I limped into my recording studio and dragged a mic to reach her, tilting her in all directions, spinning her around and pushing her across the table. The different chime patterns sounded great and distinctive, sometimes carrying on for 30 seconds or more.

I love working with tracks I record just by banging on things around my house. This is nothing a skilled or trained musician would do but my specialty is hearing rhythm and time in places most people don’t. As my Color Purple collaborators used to say, “All aboard for Willisville!” as I continually heard things in different time signatures they thought a piece of music was in and never cared about working off of a grid, preferring instead for everything to play as it lays, natural and funky. I love things that lazily and organically hang together and this little Roly Poly girl doesn’t disappoint. I doubt MPK thought he was giving me a musical instrument for my birthday but that’s exactly what she’s become.

If you ever get a chance to knock one of these gals around I hope you do. She makes one of the happiest sounds in the world.

07Mar 2010

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – 1976 Do-It-Yourself Oscar

07Mar 2010

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – 1976 Do-It-Yourself Oscar

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This is a product worthy of an Oscar for Best Kitsch, a fake wood cardboard stand-up “plaque” that looks suspiciously like the piece of cardboard that comes with any cheap picture frame, stapled on, staples askew, emblazoned with a cheap gold embossed sticker with three imprints, none of which have anything to do with the Academy Awards other than a trophy atopped with a nude female athlete that kinda sorta is in that Oscar trophy pose.

All of this is encased in a really cheap brittle plastic enclosure that’s tinted gold to make it look more fancy. The writing on the package slays me. As if any idiot wouldn’t know to “INSCRIBE IN ALLOTED SPACE YOUR OWN GRAND AWARD WITH ANY BALLPOINT PEN”. How elegant! And how worthy of ALL CAPS!

These “Awards for those you Love and Admire” – I guess ALL THREE stickers are Oscar worthy despite the lack of tie-in – were made by Syd Art Novelty Company, Inc. of New York in 1976.

The Do-It-Yourself Oscar is “Fun Giving for Gags”. Then come the words “Sports” and “Occasions.”, the latter of which somehow also merits a period. Perhaps next time Syd Art could hire an actual writer rather than some family member to create the language for a product that supposedly honors achievements in creativity.

An excellent feature of this is that the price tag is still on and it’s from the Hollywood Magic store, a relic a lot older than this do-it-yourself Oscar that’s still alive and well on Hollywood Boulevard, just down the street from where the real Oscars take place tonight.

22Feb 2010

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ Sound O’ Soul Day – James Brown Whistle

22Feb 2010

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ Sound O’ Soul Day – James Brown Whistle

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In anticipation of the throngs about to stroll through my house tonight for my annual Sound of Soul fundraiser with Pacific Radio Archives not to mention a celebration of the culmination of The Color Purple First National tour I thought that my James Brown whistle from the Godfather’s little known late 50s TV show, a rare item indeed, was the perfect Kitsch O’ The Day today. I rotate my collection fairly regularly but for this particular party everything in the house is part of my African American Pop Culture stash. As I said yesterday, it was James Brown himself who encouraged me to keep collecting these Soul artifacts as there was usually no budget to market these products on a national let alone worldwide level so they were only popular regionally. Like my game of Slang-A-Lang, Black Bingo, that was manufactured in 1969 in Detroit probably never got on shelves farther away than Cleveland.

So I’m spending the day swapping white memorabilia and otherwise for black, painting posters, moving heat lamps around – no rain in LA, yay! but still very chilly – setting out tables for fried chicken, ribs, yams, greens, peach cobbler and the like, and tweaking the house all while limping around on on a leg I wrenched a muscle in yesterday. Which means I will be blowing my James Brown whistle A LOT today trying to get everyone’s attention as we get ready for the barrage.

02Feb 2010

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – 1950’s “Fool Your Friends” Squirt Gun Pens

02Feb 2010

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – 1950’s “Fool Your Friends” Squirt Gun Pens

pen-squirt-gun_2200 These cheap, flimsy plastic fake pens were all the rage as similar ‘joke’ toys made in Hong Kong like snapping packs of gum and snakes exploding out of peanut cans flooded novelty and drugstores shelves in the 1950’s and 60’s. You pull the cap off, squeeze the pen as you hold it in water (or invisible ink!) and then aim. I bought these ultimate squirt guns by the carton full with my allowance money and spent my youth asking people if they needed a pen.

I found this set for three bucks recently. I was only paying 29 cents back in the day, which means 14.5 cents a pen/squirt gun. Though I’m still never without 10 (real and more expensive) pens on me at all times these are still my favorites.

20Jan 2010

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – 1950’s Sky King Rubber Stamping Kit

20Jan 2010

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – 1950’s Sky King Rubber Stamping Kit

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I shared many a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and Vernor’s with Sky King and Penny as nothing could separate me from the TV when they were puttering around the sky in their beloved Songbird in search of bad people, hikers and whoever else roamed the environs near their Flying Crown Ranch. I wish that Sky and Penny were roaming around the skies of LA right now zipping up the clouds so the rain and hail would subside and we could have our nice sunny LA back.

This is a teeny weenie little rubber stamp kit from the early 1950’s. I’m not sure what the tie-in to the show was but this wasn’t a show with a lot of swag so this is a rare piece of memorabilia indeed. I can’t completely make out whose stamp it was either but I’m happy to give it shelter now.

15Jan 2010

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – Long Beach City Employees Ceramic Money Pouch Bank

15Jan 2010

Allee Willis’ Kitsch O’ The Day – Long Beach City Employees Ceramic Money Pouch Bank

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Very nice of the Federal Credit Union of Signal Hill, CA to give these promotional money sack banks to Long Beach city employees but the gift would have been ever more meaningful if it came with a little cash jingling inside, something I’m sure the employees needed more than this lump of clay.

I’m not sure what year this is from but it’s definitely after November, 1991 when the 310 area code went into effect in that part of the financial world. bank-Long-Beach-city-employees_2173