LYN: (to Bob) “You expect too much of me. It’s one thing to be a modern housewife, career woman, mother. I could handle being modern. Modern is popping a frozen dinner into the microwave. I said, take your bats and go outside. But modern isn’t good enough for you. I have to be organic, holistic, learn millet recipes, make beet juice, wait around for sourdough to rise.
It just so happens the last sourdough we had was not sourdough – it was Play Dough. And we didn’t even notice the difference, Bob. So much for conscious cooking. And the ecology pageant. Robert wants to go as a nuclear reactor; I know, McCord, you want to be the hundredth monkey. You think I can buy costumes like that at K-Mart? No, I have to make them.

And wok cooking! You said it was fast!
(Throws down ironing)
Give me those bats. And go outside. It is fast.
(Striking BOB)
What takes time is having to go to Chinatown for all those Chinese vegetables.
(He grabs bat, strikes HER)
I’d never seen Bob so angry.
(Grabs other bat, strikes HIM)
You’re not so damn Zen, after all. You are passive-aggressive. Somehow we both mistook that for spirituality.

(Backs onto waterbed)
Bob threw things up to me – all the times I’d been late. All the week-ends I’d been gone. He threw things up to me like the time I let the clothes pile up for so long, by the time I got around to it, the twins had outgrown the ironing.

Bob, it’s clear what you and I both need:
a wife!